Last night, soon after Collin was asleep, he woke up and was crying inconsolably again. His nurse said it looked like he was trying to climb out of his skin, which is exactly how I described it a few weeks ago. She gave him a dose of Morphine, and had the on-call resident come see him. The Morphine did help him calm down and get back to sleep. This afternoon it happened again, just as the attending physician and resident came in during rounds. Pretty quickly the attending physician had the nurse give a dose of Morphine, and for about twenty more minutes, I held onto Collin as tightly as I could to keep him from hurting himself. Then, once the Morphine kicked in, he was perfectly calm, and was able to interact appropriately again. The attending physician talked again about Morphine withdrawal. Collin's nurse today thought it was most likely Morphine withdrawal as well. Tonight, the same thing happened; after being asleep a short time, Collin woke up screaming and slammed his head into the bed siderail as he threw himself around the bed. I held on to him as hard as I could, practicaly laying on him, so he didn't get hurt, and his nurse gave him another dose of Morphine. After a while, he calmed down, and is sleeping again as I type this. The same thing happened after the first round of chemo was done and he was taken off the Morphine pump; it is extremely physically and emotionally draining to deal with, and I'm nervous about handling it at home.
Today Collin had his last combined session with physical and music therapy for a while. Despite being tired, he participated well, and seemed to enjoy himself. I will miss all of his therapists, and I think Collin will miss them too. It will be fun to come visit and have him walk in by himself!
Collin's red blood cell count was down, so he received another blood transfusion today. He has seemed more irritable and drowsy in the last few days, so hopefully the blood transfusion will help.
The nurse practitioner said that Collin's oncologist didn't feel the need to do another lumbar puncture just yet, as recommended by the ophthalmologist. She doesn't feel that it is likeley there would be new cancer cells present in the CSF where there were none before the two reounds of chemo, especially since the MRI showed a significant reduction in the visible cancer lesions. One of the attending physicians also feels there is a possibility that the new eye deviation could be a side effect of Vincristine, one of the chemo drugs.
Tonight I learned how to place an NG tube. If Collin's tube ever comes out at home, my knowing how to replace it could save us a trip to the clinic or ER. Bill wanted me to try inserting one in him, so our nurse talked me through the procedure. I got the tube about halfway in when Bill had me stop and remove the tube because he felt like he was going to gag. Then we tried a second time with the same result. Ahout an hour later, I tried on myself (I wanted to wait until I had digested my dinner!) I measured the length from my nose to my stomach, lubricated the tube, tucked my chin, and closed my eyes. Then I slowly fed the tube into my nose and down into my stomach. I got the tube all the way down, taped it in place, and checked to see if it was placed correctly by using a stethescope to listen for the "pop" when a syringe of air is pushed through the tube. Then I pushed a syringe full of water through the tube to see what Collin feels when liquids are pushed through the tube. The water was room temperature, but it felt cold as it went across my cheek, into my nose, and down my throat. I didn't feel the fluid go into my stomach. Then I went out to the nurse's station to show the nurses; they were very surprised I had done it. When I tried to speak to them though, the tube made me feel like I was going to gag, and I turned around and ran back to the room and pulled it out. I had wanted to leave it in for at least an hour to see what it feels like, so I could have a better understanding of some of what Collin has to go through, but I couldn't do it. The whole experience leaves me more in awe of Collin, and how he is handling everything. He's my little super hero!
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